Tragic Beauty...A Good One Gone

There is something so tragic, yet so beautiful, about watching a loved one pass away.

Tragic in that I am selfish and want to keep my family around forever. Tragic in that my Nana lost a child, my Dad, uncles and aunt lost a brother and my cousins lost a dad and grandpa. Tragic in that he hurt for so long and was never really fully able to take care of himself how he needed to. 

But oh so beautiful. To know that a prayer of repentance was prayed. To know that he is no longer suffering. To be privileged enough to be there when he took his last breath. 

I will forever cherish the memories of every crazy, funny, embarrassing thing he ever said to me. All of the 5 am phone calls to my dad while I was growing up, I'd gladly wake up to them again. And not even gripe. I would go visit more, and stay longer. I would tell him "I love you. Mean it!". 

Today my heart is broken for my baby cousins who will not have their Papa there when they graduate high school. I hurt for the rest of us, that just want another day with him. 

Today I rejoice, because I serve a gracious God and now I know Ricky is basking in his presence as I type this.

Ricky Lynn McCurrie, thank you for being you. Thank you for loving us in your own way. Thank you for all of the good times. Thank you for allowing me to witness you take your last breath on this earth and your first glance at Heaven. I am beyond honored. Love you, mean it.

Rest in peace, Uncle. 

11-16-63 - 9-29-15

to every thing there is a season...

via

grief

ɡrēf/

noun

deep sorrow, especially that caused by someone's death.

"she was overcome with grief"

synonyms: sorrow, misery, sadness, anguish, pain, distress, heartache, heartbreak, agony, torment, affliction, suffering, woe, desolation, dejection, despair

Grief is a funny thing. Especially when you don't really know what you are dealing with.

I'm writing this post from the "family room" of the Hospice House where my uncle is currently being cared for.

For weeks now his "health status" has been up and down. You think his time is almost finished and then you come back a couple of hours later and he is sitting up having his chocolate milk (also known as Ensure). This whole process has just shown me yet again that we are here not on our time but on Gods and we don't leave here until he is done with us.

Most of our family has been holding vigil at my uncles bedside for a majority of the last of week. Upset at the diagnosis and the cause of the diagnosis but cherishing the good moments we have all had in the past and all of the funny stories he is telling us now, even though he has no clue what he is saying for the most part.

In just over a week of being here we have seen several families come and go as they lose their loved ones so I can't help but be thankful as I sit here tonight knowing he is resting peacefully in his room, even if only for a short time.

Ecclesiastes 3:1King James Version (KJV)

3 To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven

I say all of this just to say, love your family and let them know you love them. Don't wait until they are bed ridden and have basically been given a death sentence to come around. I know I am just as guilty of this as the next person, we get so caught up in just trying to get by that we forget the important things. I'm learning all too quickly that the important things will one day be gone and all you'll have are memories.

Make those memories. Make a lot of them.